Curious Causation

Curious Causation

1

It takes screws, nails. hinges, tape, glue, etc. We can get there using one method but if we are looking for an effective build – wouldn’t Structure be plural? 

2

 It’s either Jesus or what? Eternal damnation? A life without joy? Must the answer include Jesus? Imagination has the power to whip us into exclusive multiple choice.

3

Jesus is often seen as an example. If you ain’t doing what Jesus did or living out of what Jesus has done. There seems to be a condemnation set for you. Until you live – YOUR LIFE. This life is yours and the moment is yours to live!

4

All of us SHOULD take care of each other. At various times, we get it confused and feel it’s just about where we are going. It doesn’t hurt to forget – we are all in this together. Whether we like this or not – how we respond to service to one another is what makes the difference.

5

This is something we have heard all of our lives. Humans assign meaning where they choose to. I suppose, if one is to stare at their life and why they’re here – they’d have questions and connect answers to what’s been revealed so far. If they choose to value their lives to a destiny, that’s their prerogative.

6

Belief is how philosophers and psychiatrists spend a lot of their time. Without belief, a lot of people would be out of a job and determination. 

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If you’re anything like me. You’re curious. Curious as to why things are and what motivates us to arrive at the various conclusions. What caused this? I don’t think we’ll ever fully arrive at all of the questions we have. That’s OK because life is a trip! I ain’t gonna be tripping on how you experience the fullness of your trip! These series of questions mainly dealt with ‘Belief’ and how are our hearts are conditioned to see.  I want to mainly remind people – It ain’t about what you don’t believe in.

A lot of us have the answers already. How do you treat people? How are you being there for people? When will people start seeing that empathy is a two-way street? Some of my questions may offend or merely ignite your curiosity. In the process of writing this book – more questions have come to surface. It’s safe to say – the book is writing itself. It won’t entirely center around ‘FAITH, GOD, HEAVEN, HELL, EMPATHY’ or any other serious concepts. There’s gonna be a lot of fiction and dreamlike conclusions. Through it all, I’ve come to realize – Humans and Nature are the creators to most of what we see.

Who’s to blame? HUMANS. People make art and people invent exactly what they want them to see. Distortion of the facts is just as real as the clear reason some put up walls.I believe in people – people are capable of treating each other with respect. THIS ISN’T ALWAYS EASY BECAUSE PEOPLE CAN BE THE TRUEST ASSHOLES IN ALL OF LIVING EXISTENCE. (More on that later) I am constantly understanding the role of religion, philosophy, politics, etc in human consciousness. In terms of how we got here – there’s a different answer for each branch of knowledge. It’s not always about being right or wrong. You don’t have to hang it on your wall or frame it – but explore it. Sit with it. Let life consistently be a compass. We got a long way to go and so much more to learn. This is a cause for celebration!

“There’s A Freedom That’s Arriving
You Can Feel It In Your Soul
Liberation Will Salute You
&
Release What No Longer Suits You!” – NEW WORLD FORMING /SANANDA

Ultraviolet Bloom (Sensory Illumination)

Ultraviolet Bloom (Sensory Illumination)

It is with pleasure and joy I announce my new music video for a song I composed late last year – Ultraviolet-Bloom which is also known as Sensory Illumination! The music and the music video was done by Jeremy Garner.

In light of the vast amount of creative work me and Jeremy have created over the years, we decided it would be appropriate to have a central place where you can find our various contributions of the years! We call it Planit Jade!

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It’s way overdue for us to have a central place in the world to see what we’ve done together. Some of our first creative pieces were done as early as 2014. Usually – I am writing along under the power of inspiration and I’ll share it with Jeremy and he has a unique ability to bring those words to life. Ultraviolet Bloom is another one of those occasions where it came to fullness. I can’t thank Jeremy enough for his willingness and excitement to help bring these visions to life. It always starts as something small than before you know it – It’s fully formed.

Sensory Illumination is one of those magical journey’s that takes you through intricate halls in my mind. The music takes you away from the heart to mind. Womb and Bloom! You can listen to this song in full here.

For never was my reason to understand
That would only mean I would have to learn
My spirit wished to only kiss the space in between giving and taking
My Flesh feels the emotion of touch and while knowledge comes closer to me
Bumps begins to race up and down my skin

Sensory Illumination
Ultraviolet bloom
Hearts are taking
Ultraviolet Womb

Where Was I?
Lost in the green meadows
A sanctuary found in the grass
My spirit half past awake and dead
Are we to begin where our hearts have fluttered?

Sensory Illumination
Ultraviolet Womb
Heart is taken
Ultraviolet Bloom

Born into a world that I never knew
Feelings overtaking me – gaining strength in places unbeknown to me
Poltergeist intentions seeking to overthrow this sinking place
A ghost of desire visiting me in cracked halls
Wishing she was found but in belly, we have began

Sensory Illumination
Ultraviolet Bloom
Mind is gone
Ultraviolet Womb

In my travels from dark to light
All are opened up to me – to find
To scatter – to miss place and to redeem
AM I feeling this light or is darkness finding me home?
Gone where all questions go in search for destiny
Trapped like light inside a pyramid A bloom of ultraviolet sensory illumination
Heart is taken
Mind is gone
Ultraviolet Womb

Dreaming Of A World With More Zeros

Dreaming Of A World With More Zeros

I’m dreaming of a world with more zeros. A future filled with information which doesn’t end but repeats. A loop of daily routine found in a prism of ideas, to yield more discovery. How grand it would be, for our future to endlessly reach more experiences of love.

In a time where research is easily accessible – do you ever stop to think – we have enough information already? There’s so much hidden and revealed, there can’t be anything else left for us to know, right? Nah!

There’s plenty of wisdom left to uncover. The love of wisdom is what philosophy is at the center to root. The encouragement that comes from knowledge is awe-inspiring. The potential of knowledge made to good use revives and stimulates your nerves. When information is accessed properly – it aligns your memories to your eventual dreams.

Dreaming is to uncover those random thoughts that slipped through mundanity. *Let’s be Real: Life can be incredibly stagnant and predictable.* In spite of this, A picture that you briefly looked at it – can come back as a mansion of chandeliers. These can all be set to challenge and remind you of an essence meant to be explored when you wake up.

For a moment – picture every seed as a zero. When you plant zeros in the ground – you are essentially planting nothing. That’s what it seems. A small figure that expands into something Grand. All of the proper conditions must be in sync for it to yield a worthy result. Now think of it:

Dreaming of a world with more seeds.

Wouldn’t this be Grand? Where would we plant all of these seeds? They can’t all go into the ground – that would be limiting every other pocket waiting to be filled. Plant seeds in the clouds, souls, Children, etc. You’ll never have a shortage of places to plant seeds.

The more you plant those seeds – your zeros will stand among the many.

My dream is now living life with more seeds. More opportunities that await a future that’s entwined with past and present. It’s not that hard to see. A life that encourages us to plant seeds. To intend for a result which performs positivity.

ThEnDance (Sort of Dead)

ThEnDance (Sort of Dead)

”The dance at the end
Our memories and genetics – will they transcend?
What’s left of the impact we leave behind?
The matrix of life – does it fully unwind?
How are we then able to know?
When death reveals its face – do we all glow?
The insatiable hope that our actions aren’t in vain
That we’ll find a storage facility in some Human brain
Our lives are all but smoke cast into the air
Wishing to be smelled by the nose of those that dare
A compatible willingness to be remembered by the spices of our scent
Various pictures of our taste set aside as a tent in one’s mind
We all long to be remembered with a nostalgic bind
Experiences, memories, and our written history are the makeup of our lives
The dance floor is where we release – our collective archives”

Interrogate The ‘Why’

Interrogate The ‘Why’

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  1. “I can’t speak for anyone else, but I either know or I don’t know.”
  2. “It is only by grace through faith that we are saved. It is sort of like saying can you be saved if someone is reaching down the grab you from a sinking ship, but you smack the hand, then no you can’t be saved cause you are rejecting what can save you.”
  3. You can have faith and be lost too. In our mindset, we know where we gonna go but in reality, things will throw us off and we can get lost for a little IF we pay attention to that escape that is prepared for us to exit to that right path. So either way, both sides can get lost with or without faith. We just need to wake up and pay attention.” 
  4. “Only in case one is religious.”
  5.  “If you’re sincere.”
  6. Belief = Faith Faith=Belief.
  7. “You can have all the faith in the world and still the one doing the saving can still choose to say no.”2.jpeg
  8. I Like To Believe That All Roads Lead Home.”
  9.  “If you ask from religious folks their answer is yes.”
  10. “All forks in the roads lead to a destination.”
  11. “Lost or found – faith has little to nothing to do with it.”
  12. “Sometimes being lost is better than being found rather than being taken back to a house that isn’t a home.”
  13. “Yes, because if you don’t keep the faith – you are already lost, but what’s wrong with being lost?”
  14. “Faith is neither here or there – it’s a word to describe hope which we all have to some extent. Not having this, doesn’t make you anymore at ‘home’ than you being lost until you get to your destination.”3.jpeg
  15. “Faith is a worthy substitute. Our “gut feeling” comes from nowhere else but the highest. Some people call it common sense. Some people call it instinct. If people ask for evidence of proof, I believe that your mind and feelings are sufficient enough.”
  16. “Faith is born of evidence given in mysterious forms.”
  17. With me, I can see the evidence unfolding but it’s not ready to give birth yet. But my faith is like it has to be there, it just has to be there, oh it’s going to be there, heck yeah it’s there!!! BAM there it is after the fact. It scares me and then I’m reminded of Him that I asked and my faith was just strong to break those walls down!
  18. Do I believe in God? Heaven and Hell? Evidence and proof of a feeling, proof of our own human minds. What is right and wrong? Judgements! Create feelings! Hate is a choice. We must unlearn! I will say this for the record. I have been told I am going to Hell because of my demonic queer, lifestyle. So ungodly! This is what I tell the people who tell me this.. To be honest, I would be happy and grateful to go to Hell. Finally surrounded by my LGBTQ family, it would be one big happy LGBTQ dance party. I would be much safer in hell, then I am, here, on earth. The reality I live, is that people want me dead, because of religion, and religious beliefs, is that being Christian? I thought that was 1 of the ten commandments,”thou shall not kill?” Oh but you’re not actually taking a gun and pulling the trigger, but you are! You are separating yourself individually and now as a collective whole with judgments, right and wrong, those bullets are silent and yet very deadly… and Yes there are real bullets too. People actually die in the LGBTQ community. Someone in my LGBT family was murdered, found dead, two weeks ago, this exists people. Check your faith people – what you believe.
  19. If it’s a belief, it’s not evident.
  20. I think the very definition of faith is to believe without evidence. If someone tells me that there’s money growing on the tree in their yard, I’m going to want evidence before I turn up with my basket and start picking! But faith is almost a form of esoteric evidence, where you know something is true, even though you don’t have the evidence required to prove it to someone else. Luckily, we don’t have to, which is why faith is usually either a very personal, or else community-focused thing. 
    I’m genuinely puzzled by religions that try to convert people because they literally have no evidence to show, so they are trying to somehow generate faith in another’s heart, and that’s like trying to make a rainbow. You can’t make a rainbow, only God (or the Universe/alternative higher power/science) can do that, and it typically needs a particular set of circumstances in the lead up to it. 
    In general (although there are exceptions), the bigger the storm, the brighter the rainbow. Similarly, the bigger the crisis, the brighter faith shines in someone’s heart when it finally arrives (and it probably doesn’t ring the doorbell!)
  21. Not having evidence and believing is Faith. 

    Thank you to everyone who participated so far! You may or may not find your answer here but this series will continue on until July. My goal in providing these answers are not to dissect the categories of where these answers stem from. Philosophy and opinions share the same veins and the goal here is to expose the blood that gets us going. Although, we are not always going. Standing still in the middle of our quest – while we interrogate the ‘WHY’. What leads us to these various paths? The more we ask – we get a little bit closer.

Getting There

Getting There

FOLLOW ME AS I CAPTURE THE ESSENCE OF THE WIND
WE MAY BEGIN TO REVEAL THE SEEDS OF MY SIN
CRYSTAL STARLIGHT HOVERING OVER YOUR HAIR
A WANDERING CALL BECKONS YOU TO SIT OVER THERE

AND NOW HERE YOU ARE NERVOUS WITH DESIRE
WISHING FOR PURPOSE TO STING YOU WITH A HOLY FIRE
THEY CAN’T SEEM TO SEE THROUGH YOUR OPEN WINDOW
THOUGH YOUR HEART BEATS WITH A CRIPPLING CRESCENDO

LOST IN AN UNKNOWN LAIR – WHERE GOVERNING BEATS REPEAT
SOUNDS GLISTEN PROVIDING RHYTHMIC MEDICINE TO YOUR FEET
A MAP OF PROMISE BEGINS TO ARISE FROM THE SMOKE
A CAT APPEARS TO REMIND YOU OF FATES JOKE

HOW DID YOU EVER FIND THIS ARENA OF CIRCUMSTANCE
WHEN DID YOU EVER FORGET THE CODE OF TRANCE
NOW YOU CAN’T HELP BUT TRIP ON A SLIPPERY BASE
THEY CAN’T UNSEE YOUR BONAFIDE FACE

THE TOKENS HAVE ALL FELL OVER INSIDE A SHALLOW CREEK
AS OUR POCKETS WERE FULL – WE COULD HARDLY SPEAK
BLESSED ARE THE DAGGERING MOTIONS FROM THE SEA
FOR WOE WAS THEE, NO LONGER ME – FOR NOW WE HAVE THE KEY

Level UP @ 3

Level UP @ 3

Tempting to make a living out of a death sentence. That’s the struggle for existence. Caught in between the cycle of wanting and owning. LEVEL UP!

The abrasive wrestle between gone and coming. There is both the need to be seen in invisible clothes. LEVEL UP!

When talking to you – I’ll repeat what you said in order to indicate I was listening. If you don’t want those words thrown back at you I’ll just ’MmmHmm’ You until you get the point. LEVEL UP!

Seeing as I experienced one of the most random trips recently to Arizona and neighboring areas – it’s about time I level up! *seriously, shit has been absolutely crazy.*

I’ve taken for granted living in Sweden for a long time. Coming back to America for a spell meant more sugar, money, and unforeseen realities all encouraging me to level up. Settling for what has already been prepared is a danger zone. You have to see ahead like the eagle and use all of the resources made available to you. Wherever you are – it’s imperative that you level up!

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What do I mean by ‘Level Up’? Simply, regain your fuel. You’re spending at this very moment precious time and energy. You can covert this at your leisure but you most certainly use the wings you’ve been provided to fly away into productive manifestation. Don’t wait for nothing. Nothing ain’t coming but something is always around the corner. Believe that!

This fact has made me more aware of my wrestle with paranoia and the weight that comes with it. Basically, Murphy’s Law is a B*I*T*C*H*! Knowing that anything that can go wrong will go wrong – has been coughing me up and especially seeing my connection with the number 3.

For as long as I could recall numbers would follow me in some way. Whether it’s some form of ‘7’ (14,56,34) or some form of ‘9’ – it has happened to me all the time. This particular season of *2018* we are only 21 Days Into it – 3×7 – 3 has been this important number of leveling up. I’ve seen it in the most inconvenient and teaching way possible.

Which goes back to my relationship with paranoia – which isn’t always a great way for it to reveal itself back to me. Let’s say two bad things have happened to me back to back – then I start thinking another bad thing must be on its way towards me.

Although, this could also mean something really good is due to happen to balance it all out.

I want to level up but it’s hard when your mind starts making nonsense out of coincidental situations. (Or is it coincidental?)

I doubt myself and while I believe this is a very good quality it can become problematic due to not having enough faith in myself.

We should all level up, yes? Can we do this without annihilating our present convictions? Certainly!

I don’t have a particular formula to establish this – but I do know that all of us are apart of this game of connecting all of our experiences. The way in which we do is selective to our interpretative measures. If we ease on the stress and live in the moment, we’ll do better at remembering “The Birds are Singing” we don’t have to hang on to fear and stress, stress, stress, and more stress.

Thanks, Sananda.

Obsession With Filling (Feeling) The Page

Obsession With Filling (Feeling) The Page

I gotta feel what I’m writing. In search of this ‘feeling’, I’ve had to wrestle with just how much I’m writing on a page. If I write too little will people think I had little to say? If I write too much – got damn, I’m on my Jester Rants! (Btw, my YouTube channel will resurrect with more content this year!)

I want to win but I know losing is literally trying to find out what people like/want. Trying to fit in what people expect is much like the weather. It changes from day to day, although it’s much easier to know your target market through proper analytics! I must heed this while breaking into new areas.

The motivation, inspiration, and persuasion have always been a wavy sense of connection. I’m an explorer and the more I Search – I see an undeniable encoding in various life experiences.

The more I dig, the greater this connection speaks to me. As I’m writing this – I’m already seeing several ways this blog is gonna go. How do I maintain my focus without losing the ‘feeling’?

You feel me?

It’s important to chase the feeling and follow it wherever it leads you. As of now – my thoughts are leading me to fill the space. We don’t have to keep writing but the more I do – the closer I am to getting to my point.

The lines are drawn and the door is open. The more I write what I feel, the clearer I see how everything is connected. After all, buttons Connect and that’s why we button up our shirts. The symbols I see in everyday interaction come to life through my words. My words will become a platform for discovering the hidden and visible.

I find that at times, I’m caught in between the insufferable *but pleasurable* thigh of allegory and innuendo. I enjoy the warm embrace of making sense out of philosophical possibilities. This can be a task too daunting for my readers. It makes you read a lens not so commonly visited. You stand to benefit with this-this is a remix. Something that’s already been said but my way.

2018 is here and already 14 Days Into it, I’ve had to put in the work before it arrived. I use to say “I always am writing” but this couldn’t be further from the truth. I can’t always write otherwise – I wouldn’t have time to process, read, or observe. What is true though – is I can encourage myself to write with knowledge of a paycheck or simple creative fun. Getting into the habit of writing helps me contextualize those random words that always seem to float somewhere.

This year – I am taking more seriously the notion that I’m writing a book. I’m gonna need your help. It won’t write itself but the basis of it is already laid out.

I’m excited to share with you what more my pen will reveal. After all – It’s all about writing until the pens run out! Only this time – I ain’t doing it just to fill the page as long as I’m feeling it, the hope is that you will too!

Bless up!

The Opening Quest

The Opening Quest

In preparation for further development of my book, I decided to answer several questions from one of my favorite authors Dushka Zapata.

These questions set the tone for 2018 while also inspiring me to invite you to send me questions that you have thought about existence. The goal isn’t to overthink but to answer with what you feel in the heart of the moment.

Here are my favorite 14 questions.

1. “If life had no meaning, what meaning would I create for mine?”

I’d create a meaning that would mean something to me tomorrow. A meaning that has enough nutrition to last for me and those who came after me. If no others came after me then the meaning would have to be enough to satisfy me even when I’m bored. Something to make me laugh and cry because it’s all so beautifully complex.

2. “If there was no purpose to our existence, what purpose would I give to mine to shield myself from existential despair?”

I would make it a mission to make someone think about their life and what they can do with it. I would want them to laugh at how ironic this whole game of life is. I would want to show myself and people around me how life is so short and how we should chase what gives us that rush.

3. “What matters to me? Why? And once I figure this out, can I determine an order of importance?”

Freedom matters most to me. To be at full liberty without the worry that I must stop at the disadvantage of someone’s inability to respect my equilibrium. If I could get out of someone’s way to their freedom. Establishing importance would mean to know it’s not just about me.

4. “Is there a healthy, logical correlation between my priorities and how I spend my time? If not, why?”

I give myself too much time for tasks I feel can wait. I must embed a pattern of usual, so I don’t buy into the distractions because god knows I have binged on many distractions. I think I have bought so much time because I see time as an illusion and I feel I always have time, but I’ve come to realize I don’t always have time. It’s always leaving me when I gain it.

5. “What am I afraid of? Can I learn to distinguish the fear that protects me from the fear that stops me?”

“They say everybody is afraid of something although I don’t know what actually makes me afraid now. I am drawn to the unknown and I believe fear makes us strong at times. I suppose my fear is to be consistent in the most western way of doing it. (I must always pay my bills and have enough left over) Constantly making enough that is sufficient and inspiring enough to last. The best way for me to distinguish it is to fail occasionally and not feel guilty about it.”

6.”What happens when I get what I want? Is it glorious, empty, triumphant, anticlimactic? Why?”

I usually feel content with it. Sometimes when I want something so very badly and get it – I don’t feel like it was worth the wanting. I would like to capture the gloriousness more because there’s substance in playing in that feeling. I think it becomes anticlimactic because I knew I could get it – I just didn’t think I would survive the trip to get there.

7. “What does happiness mean to me? What makes me happy and how can I capture that elusive sensation more often?”

Happiness means more laughter and learning found in simple and complex things. I think if I read more, the joy of happiness will show up more.

8. “What hurts me? How can I become stronger against what causes me to suffer? How and where can I learn to suffer less? How can I remind myself that the person who makes me suffer the most is me?”

I hurt myself when I don’t own up to my decisions and how they influence others. I should remember that I am in the driver’s seat and that my reactions can be calmer. To be mindful of silence and that words don’t always have to be spoken.

9. “What is left of me if I attempt to define myself without leaning on anything I do? I am a student, I am a writer, I am a mom, I am a manager, I am a Vice President – these are all things I do. Who am I? Where is she?”

This is a very complex one. I am here and while I am here, I want to make as much hell and fun on this trip. I observe, sleep, learn and then convert this knowledge into love for everyone around me.

10. “How can I avoid losing myself in my relationships? What are my boundaries and how do I enforce them?”

One way is to have a clear understanding that we do not belong to each other but that we are only appreciating and honoring each other’s company. That we live with the knowledge that we can together but sometimes we may steer to our own strengths by ourselves. I can enforce my boundaries by staying true to myself without shame or pressure.

11. “What do my feelings teach me about myself? If I feel anger or jealousy, can I learn not to react to these feelings but instead determine what they are trying to tell me?”

They are trying to tell me to maybe rearrange what I do not understand. To Ask more questions and to speak softly and to apologize when I’ve assumed too much. I can learn by simply remembering people are often in the same state as me. They just want clarity.

12. “What happens when I sit in silence?”

I find that the stillness in myself is still yearning to speak to myself in riddles of nothing but me, myself, and I.

13. “How can I better manage change? How can I get better at accepting how little control I have?”

Knowing that I did not choose to be born here at the time I was. Some parts are played long before I got here.

14. “How would I like to be remembered?”

“Remembered for good company with a fresh willingness to open a door that people didn’t really think about turning, making them laugh while thinking.”

If you got through all of my answers to these magnificent questions, I applaud your interest endearingly! I encourage you to answer some of these questions as well! I wanted to start 2018 with these questions because they would open up my understanding of myself and where I want to go.

I am making it a mission to write way more while reading, listening, and observing.

We can do this thing together – narrating and asking. This will help us climb the ladder for clarity among all living things!

((*Every 7th of the month from now until March – I’ll post 3 of my favorite questions (& 7 replies) that I find correlates with the book I’m working on! If you have any questions that you have asked at any time // feel free to email me at jesterj7@hotmail.com

Peddle Deep

Peddle Deep

I was peddling so hard – I didn’t know how close I was to falling down, until about 28 minutes ago! Ever get in the mood for just a race? You want to run so far as if some zombie is coming behind you! When you got that kind of motivation your legs become even more determined to go faster!

My legs were fully inspired. By the time, I was just about to get to my destination. It dawned on me – I had to stop before coming body first into a collision. (Duh!) Before nearly crashing -I hit the breaks HARD! So hard where I nearly fell off my damn bike!

Luckily tho, my instincts kicked in right in time for me to feel how close I was to falling off. My hands grabbed the handlebars earnestly. Like a man in love holds his lover in the time of delight, I was holding onto dem bars TIGHT!

Suddenly, my feet slid at an angle where it then dragged for several seconds while gulping equilibrium in the process. To make matters more sensitive – I had on soft Nike’s too. I got up – having realized I made it to my destination without falling off. Basically: It hurt like hell at the time it was all done.

As I walked up to put the bike back in place – I felt a pulsating pain. I legit thought I had fractured my ankle. I was happy I didn’t fall off. If the breaks were not engaged – I would have easily run on various solid surfaces.

I guess it didn’t matter how hard I was peddling – as long as I made it to my destination safely. A bit bruised up? Yes. A pep in my step due to avoiding my body crashing? Yes. But no long-term pains.

This taught me a valuable lesson: No matter how fast you’re going. How determined you are. You’re gonna have to stop. You’d be pressed to remember soon before it’s too late. So, peddle deep but take it easy around the corners – remember to break with a considerable sloth BEFORE arriving at your destination.