Pursuit // Pleasure

Pursuit // Pleasure

*The following script, is in connection to a series of conversations entitled ‘Riddle Me That…” which is due for release at the beginning of 2019.

Palmar: Hey, have you tried the new app Fructose that allows you to explore the depths of glucose?

Allegra: Ah! Yes! It’s so good. Every time I think I should put it down – it proves me to be a liar because I can’t let it go. It’s like that chip you keep coming back too and the lemonade your grandmother makes! It’s just addictive like crack, honestly! lol!

Palmar: That’s what I heard and probably precisely why I ain’t trying to give it a go. I don’t want to do anything that makes me a slave to it.

Allegra: Who claimed you’d be a slave to it?

Palmar: Well, you mentioned crack and grandma’s lemonade…I’d say it’s quite powerful. Powerful enough to be the master of your senses. If it makes you a liar that means you can’t contest it.

Allegra: I never tried to contest it because I enjoy indulging it so much.

Palmar: Have you tried to abstain from it to see how your body would react to it?

Allegra: I ain’t trying to break away from it because I worry I might be dependent on it and you know the body develops dependence to some substances. If an alcoholic goes cold turkey it could literally kill them because they abused it for so long.

Palmar: So, would you say you abuse fructose?

Allegra: I suppose, I do. But we all abuse various things in life – I don’t think it’s a big deal.

Palmar: If you don’t want to live long and develop various diseases – you do have a point.

Allegra: Yeah but I don’t see why you are making it seem as if pursuing pleasure is a bad thing, we all have our various vices.

Palmar: You know what they say: Everything in moderation. If you feel you can’t resist fructose you might to want to start cutting it out one day at a time. Cold turkey might not be the best alternative but slowly breaking away from your addiction secures a better future for your mental and physical health.

Allegra: But I like fructose, why break away from what I like?

Palmar: Not all vices are remedies to the consequences that come from them.

Allegra: Ok. Well, I’m going to do me, and you can do you.

Palmar: So, are you saying you rather continue to head down a cycle of abuse because this is YOU right now?

Allegra: All I said is I’ll do me, and you will do you. I never asked you to lecture me about the dangers of fructose. I am aware of how bad it could be. However, as with anything they’re loopholes.

Palmar: I reckon those loopholes are very few.

Allegra: So, are you going to interrogate me about this from this day forth? Are you going to continually remind me how I’m killing myself and recommend me articles and links to help me get better or what? Do you think most obese and overweight people know they are or should they be constantly reminded of this fact?

Palmar: Healthy reminders shouldn’t be triggers.

Allegra: But they shouldn’t reinforce a sense of evangelism either. You can say what you need without judging me for it or educating me on something that I already know about. Some of us are on our way dying and can’t be convinced to change their habits. (Maybe they want to die or don’t care much for changing) No need to put me through an intervention. If I was on my death bed and I wanted to try LSD would you refuse me of that? Would you tell someone who is already dying that they should take proper steps to ensure they live longer? For what purpose? I don’t have children or a partner depending on my life.

Palmar: So, if you had children or a partner – that wouldn’t compel you to live longer?

Allegra: I’m not totally sure. That’s not why I do what I do. I have plenty of friends including yourself that may want the best for me. I just want you to know I understand the risks and if experience leads me to make a remarkable change then I’ll oblige but for now, I’ll enjoy my fructose but take more consideration to moderation.

Palmar: That’s good, I’m happy to hear that.

Allegra: I hope you live long and stay clear from the range of accidents! You know you never know when they may happen. *chuckles*

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Characters In The Wind (Remastered)

Characters In The Wind (Remastered)

The Full-Length film ‘Characters In The Wind’ was released in 2016 but now remastered with added bits and pieces in 2018. I was initially, completely hesitant about remastering this but I needed to do it, because of my unsatisfaction on some levels with it originally. I wanted to explain the Jester Eye X – symbol once in for all which debuted at the start of 2016.

Screenshot 2018-07-09 09.11.27

CITW is the short film where conversation, poetry, music, and narration come to manifestation in full. I go all over the place which is represented by the arrows going in various directions.  I did not include an explanation for this originally but now I have while also describing what ‘Happy Forever means.

I’m sure this short film was not watched by many in fact, according to YouTube only 360 people watched it. 😀CITW2016YTMETRICS

Now you have the opportunity to watch it again, 2 years later REMASTERED! I hope you will join in on the conversation with me and enjoy it!


I’m also asking for donations of only $7.33 // or whatever your heart desires in light of completion of this project!

paypal.me/jessejenkins or for those who do not have Paypal you can submit donation here.

 

 

Donations For Creative Content

7.33 Your Donations Help Me A Great Deal!

$7.33

 

HOW TO HARVEST THE STATIC

HOW TO HARVEST THE STATIC

I was talking to one of my good friends about my poetry and he started laughing at the thought of some random person reading “hOw To hArVeSt tHe StAtIc“. I couldn’t stop laughing because it’s true. I often come up with the most random titles and I don’t imagine a huge crowd gathering around to bother to understand what I’m saying. It’s a niche market and certainly, some people may find out these things by happenstance. I couldn’t even pretend a huge amount of people would find what I do interesting. Most people tune into the language of opinions that they favor most.

I do try to tag and promote myself accordingly *to help with exposure* but the chances of me getting lost on the web are tremendous. People have a list of many channels in their view. You turn the channel if whatever is on doesn’t provide a source of humor or education. One day you may tune into my channel and hopefully, I’ll have you at the right time. The power of click-bait media transforms who are more willing to watch. It works because people are more prone to watch and listen to something they agree with or are interested in. This is to my disadvantage, however, as I am not fully aware of the tools that can be catchy enough to get people to watch me.

There’s a lot of static going on in my brain. I’ve been reading and listening more to reach a center. We’re all busy and there is always something on our radar – so consider harvesting the static. Gather the silence and who knows, maybe you may liberate yourself from a whirlwind of distractions. It’s often in the distractions, where we find purpose at the center. The roads we didn’t intend, all measure to the exact place we were destined to be. (Sometimes you can accidentally tune in and who knows…)  I can say more, but that’s why I made this video.

The Encounter (of The Bullet)

The Encounter (of The Bullet)

You can not always dodge the bullet meant for you. Some people come to the party already locked and loaded. By preparing yourself for any possible encounter with danger you still risk the encounter of a wildcard. To be shot is to be healed by the medication of bandages and possible surgical procedure. *Unless shot in the head or if the bullet punctured a vital point.* We can’t always miss the bullet especially if there’s one designed for you. If a sniper is out chilling on a skyscraper somewhere, they have you in target and nothing can fully protect you from it.

It’s a safe comfort to know, at most times this isn’t the case. If you’re free from pissing off the wrong people, there’s no bullet with your name on it. At least not an actual bullet, but if we’re talking about a metaphorical bullet dressed as a threat?

Those you won’t be able to protect yourself from. Nowadays people go through extreme measures to shame and silence if you come with criticism. We can see how this clearly happened with Nicki Minaj in her recent interview where she implied women should not “sell sex” and to know their worth. This sparked various comments from people challenging the root of her statements to get an objective point of view.

However, Nicki actually responded to someone on Twitter personally by not only attacking him but encouraging her ‘barbs’ to follow suit to teach him a lesson. This resulted in thousands of death threats, revealing his personal phone numbers and address, and personal attacks on his Twitter page. Nicki Minaj has millions of followers and he has only over 240k. This is an example of abused power at the expense to publicly embarrass you because of a disagreement.

The internet has become a place where we consistently release our disagreements and even go as far as talking against someone the moment they disagree. Threat culture seeks to dimish and silence those that simply steer in another direction. If you express an opinion of someone who’s favorable their army so to speak can come at you unawares. I experienced this recently with another popular psychologist who has gotten a fair amount of attention – Jordan Peterson.

It started out as a simple debate he had with Fry, Dyson, and Goldberg about Political Correctness. I watched a small portion of their debate and in this clip, I happen to agree with Dyson a bit more than Peterson. (I eventually watched the whole debate and I happen to validate all of the points they offered) I expressed my reasons for this and expressed them but people *by the hundreds* came to tell me how wrong my views were.

Luckily, I don’t have a large platform as of yet and I have not gained nearly as much attention as some people have but if I did – I wouldn’t see the end of it. This is the case for anyone online especially now who may encounter a mob just by simply expressing a difference of thought.

The Encounter of a bullet. The Encounter of a mob. The announcement of our fears may invite them into our psyche. However, we can still speak out against the threat. This reminded me of a video I made 3 years ago. It must have been inspired about the same things that are inspiring me to bring it back out again. I remember uploading it but I did very little to remind people I made it. In other words, there was hardly any promotion or tags to get it out there. UNTIL NOW.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ObyI0nvebjk

Oh, the wonders of the internet. It never goes away.

I’m only saying what a lot of people have said throughout history only that I’m sitting down for seven minutes talking into the camera the old school ay. No edits, no filters. I hope you can find something in it and share it with your friends and yes, make it go viral or at least on your timeline somewhere! 😀

Opaque

Opaque

(If you rather listen instead of reading – CLICK HERE)

Opaque –  not transmitting radiation, sound, heat, etc.

This disturbance of my peace steady lingers in my opaque heart. I am wishing to find a balanced memory. One that isn’t tainted by the lullabies of betrayal or bad news.

If there’s one thing we have an abundance of, is plastic! Bad News is like plastic. I don’t think we’re even aware of how well versed we are with the bad news cycle.

It’s not particularly beneficial long or short term if not met with balanced stories that service positivity.

I feel this even more so as a person of color. People of color are so well versed in trauma, that we’ve internalized the mere occurrence by heavily sharing it out of outrage.

We even urge others to make videos VIRAL of police brutality or some form of prejudice. While this may certainly bring necessary attention – if we only do this without proper balanced good news, none of it has the potential to serve us any good.

We justify this as to bring awareness to brutality which in many ways are important.

The key to solving this conundrum is knowing that you don’t have to tolerate the constant bad news cycle.

There’s just as much good news as bad news, it just tends to be dressed and packaged in the commonly disposable (plastic) reaction…“ aww how sweet” whereas devastating news or sad news is packaged as “conscious or necessary to know”.

If our collective good and productive contributions are rarely acknowledged at the expense of plastic, easily produced bad news – this rubric can’t be to our advantage.

What we should know but often forget is those bad things has been happening since the dawn of humanity. This doesn’t mean we can’t sympathize with those affected by trauma but that we should correlate it with the bigger picture. *things are much better now than before!*

We should also remember those good things are in abundance as well.

Remember the good things and do good things unexpectedly. Share good things even the ones that seem important.

Even the small good things, like you, had your favorite meal today or that you got a smile from someone who doesn’t typically smile. Good things don’t have a rubric of interest.

If sharing those good things are received by a simple – “aww how cool” or even the unconventional thumbs up! We can learn to appreciate that. The alternative often involves a non-productive response which can end up making you feel worst than before.

In light of this awareness, I am developing a new rule: If you’re gonna share bad news, meet it with something cool or even weird. Weird is better than bad. Cool is more informative than bad.

The bad news cycle isn’t always unnecessary but not always useful either.

Hindsight tends to laugh at our previous business.

Indeed we are often shady businessman – making deals impulsively not properly planning quarterly.

My prudential interest serves me because I was taught to consider my own values. Self-care is not just about pampering but taking care of fundamental needs.

I have come to bite the fruit of despair.

If seeing you there meant believing in our dream, I would not hesitate to go asleep.

Now I can’t be seen as truly wanting absolution.

From the morning complaints to the afternoon joke that turned sour.

The evening sun casts a gloomy indifference.

Who’s to say what it could mean?

We are locked in the chain of belittling attacks.

To be understood is our misfire.

We’ve stepped in the sulking cold, right when springtime arrived.

Never late but hardly in time for our lifestyles.

Will they ever mesh? Or could we ever be more than our aging flesh?

I thought that together with our growth would make time for all the rest.

But sometimes, shortcomings are aging truths that remain on the viral dial.

In my halls of shallow emotions, still, I write.

To be known for who I am and whom I will become without a fight.

We are all but a forgotten flower.

Purchased for the dining set table.

But we simply seem unable and that is why my opaque heart longs…for good news packaged in a reusable material.

THE TRIGGERED GENERATION

THE TRIGGERED GENERATION

Hell Yeah, we’re Triggered.

It’s 2017 and everybody I know gets Triggered. It’s on some ASMR type of flow. Are you seeing the same shit I’m seeing?

Maybe you haven’t been aware of the plethora of ways in which trauma can be unlocked – but let me tell you: The box and key are always engaged in some kind of slippery slope of twists and turns.

Have you been living underneath a rock or something?

Every and anything can be triggering!

What’s funny about it – is that it doesn’t take much really. We’re constantly forced to deal with things and a lot of those things have childhood triggers we don’t understand yet.

Upon sudden contact – Bing!

We’re then pushed in the wrestling ring by the beast we haven’t fully seen.

Anytime I smell its fragrance – It gets a little bit closer to defeating me. I’m PRESSED because I can’t predict when my next collapse will take place?

It’s on the television. It’s on my phone. In the classroom. At work. With my family. With friends that I hang out with. I have no idea what I’m gonna see or what I hear and how this may trigger me wherever I happen to be.

Triggers are invisible forces that I can’t seem to protect myself from.

No warning. No map for closure. My anxiety is constantly multiplying because of various triggers.

These are close to home reminders that are not so easy to run away from.

I heard somebody say “Our generation should just get a grip and not be so loose on our emotions when they run through us like a flame.” I’m just laughing at that cuz IF we could pick and choose what triggered us, we wouldn’t be so damn triggered.

While we can’t control how they come, I suppose we understand those triggers. We can begin to learn how to unpack some of those various traumas.

Identifying them can be hard work tho – but it’s our responsibility.

Are we the Triggered Generation? I’d say Hell Yeah! But people long before us have had these triggers.

We’re just a bit more aware of the impact they have and there’s comfort in knowing – we ain’t all alone in this.

This piece is for my friend Loxten, which will be used for his future project.

Fran-Spective on Sleep

She’s Awesome, Witty, and just overall Cool


I totally get this. I even dream of sleeping. I look forwards not being plugged into the constant. The always happening N.E.W.S. which is always reminding me of some new way to be terrorized. Sleep is necessary but we fight to avoid it because of the business of the everyday waking life. But, like Fran – the invariable of being awake is enough to avoid as much as possible. I get a lot of work done in my dreams. I understand what’s happening and how the past happened by listening to my dreams. So now // zzzz’s lead to A.

Oh btw, I love Fran Lebowitz. I’ve been reading her essays and watching her interviews and I’m constantly learning. Another quote to leave with:

“Think before you speak. Read before you think. This will give you something to think about that you didn’t make up yourself.” 

New World Water AND The Media Given Pill

I applied for 7 jobs today and I am literally exhausted.

I am about to work out very soon to keep my progress for Fitness in full rotation!

As I applied, I noticed just about every one of them with the exception of about two asked for unnecessary information.

This information is unnecessary because it would not affect my work ethic. COLOR, GENDER, ORIENTATION, AND DISABILITY should not mean anything to anyone. These are things the system wants to divide and conquer. Since when did statistics mean something? Sure they help us measure the development of a variable, but they do should not conquer individuals. Variables and change are not the same things, and we all have our unique pattern unlike anyone else.

What’s really the point of identifying color and Race. We are all one people, so giving the descriptions of what I am means nothing. Some people have already colored our own color by adding descriptions and laws based on what they perceived us to be.

But this is the same avenue that elects cartoon characters as politicians. So I guess I’m not that surprised. (That’s a new topic right there!)

So many of us are asleep because we have been drinking New World Water and a Media given Pill. I like to think of this pill as a blinding illusion that keeps one entertained. It promises us of the feast of satisfaction given by the Celebrity and Technological life. We see the fame, glory, measure, and talent as our minds crave it. I’ve realized it in my own veins, I had some time thinking about the overwhelming struggle and information that has been held hostage in our society due to the development of how we socialize.

Think for a moment will you of the information given to you FREELY at your exposure. Your fingers only need to dance on the keyboard for a few seconds to entertain some of this information. On the other hand, you don’t have to move at all. Corporations have set up businesses that feed us without having to move. We are being fed by the spoon of the media, and it’s more like a service to ourselves. They feed us wealth,  of information and tools of how we can talk to one another. But, why talk…when you forget about walking? Walking keeps us in motion and keeps our bodies energized. It keeps us in the focused pivot of strategies. We don’t even need to imagine a world where robots take over, we are already living in that world. Our mindsets have somewhat become robotic, and we are all seemingly; walking around with a tormented allegiance to a system of programs.

The instruments that could be used to socialize our ideas of value, justice, grace, and honesty, have been traded for the pleasures of our temporal lusts motivated by our ‘friends’. (ADS PEOPLE?) Values seem to only come up with some calamity or worldwide adversity. Then people want to call on a ‘Love’ and concern. But, What matters is an awakening to love…Now! To the whole world. Fashion means a great deal, but it means even greater when we know why we wear what we wear. Why we put on the morning of our dreams and set our heads on the footstool of our visions…

It’s time to wake Up..if anything should be colorized; it is a revolution! Colors of value and a source of transcendence gives us more than enough animation. So even as I went on a deeply invested rant here..^^

Stop letting someone else feed you all the time. Feed yourself AND MOVE!

Summarized Notion For Thought: Please, stop deepening on that pill that keeps you asleep. It’s only doing more to make you lazy and obese. Nothing is wrong with having muscle but the muscle could help a nation if we can build stones together. If we can use what we have for someone else and lend our passions to the addition of real lives.