MIGHT // ABLE

MIGHT // ABLE

The following script is in connection to a series of conversations entitled ‘Riddle Me That…’ which is due to release at the beginning of 2019.

Maybean: Hey Fo’sho!!! I was thinking about bringing to light an idea that has been stalking me in the back of my mind.

Fo’sho: Really Maybean? Why don’t you bring it into light, that way you can see if it’s a good idea or not?

Maybean: Perhaps I will. It would be nice to see what was done in the dark manifested in the light.

Fo’sho: Let’s do it. I’ll get started on the preparation.

Maybean: Well, I’m not ready yet, I’m still working on the basic idea.

Fo’sho: Let me know when you are ready, I can help you with the basic layout. If you don’t mind.

Maybean: That would be cool. I’ll try to remember when I get all the ideas in a clear format.

Fo’sho: You sound hesitant against my help.

Maybean: Well perhaps, I’m just not totally clear about what I want to do, yet.

Fo’sho: I’m capable of following out the plan for you?

Maybean: But the plan is still haunting me. It’s like that word that is on the tip of your tongue, that you can’t fully pronounce. Like seeing the picture in your head but being unable to illustrate all the fine details.

Fo’sho: You rarely if ever get the details fully flushed out. I can help with that if you are willing to receive my help. I need more than your willingness. I want you to sign my name so that I can show up on time.

Maybean: However, I am not totally sure if this idea is as fluid as you see it. If I work this idea with you, it won’t just be my idea but ours. You might add to it somethings I don’t want to be in it.

Fo’sho: How would you even know, if you haven’t even got the basic idea out?

Maybean: I suppose you are right.

Fo’sho: I volunteered to help you bring it out of the midnight corners of your mind. Whatever is out there in the dark may be bulky and less specific– you may be unable to do it on your own. We can collaborate on this together, if you want.

Maybean: I suppose, I don’t know? The way I measured the idea in my mind was just a scent and shade of something that had the potential to be bigger. It is not capable of letting me go. (*I don’t believe the idea will be given to someone else*.) I don’t have to say it over and over for me to remember it. It only takes once, and I’ll go back to it until when I can fully build on it. Perhaps, you can help me bring it out, a little later? Once I pull it beyond the shadows?

Fo’sho: Understood. By the way,

remember that script I told you, I was working on?

Maybean: I think I know which one you’re talking about.

Fo’sho: Well whether you think you know or have simply forgotten, that script is already done. I’m waiting for it to be edited so I can submit it to my publisher.

Maybean: The reason why I say, I THINK is because you never clarified which script you were talking about. You had several scripts you were working on. I wasn’t sure.

Fo’sho: My bad, I’m talking about the script about the drug planted by the government and addictive prostitutes entwined to it.

Maybean: I don’t recall that script? It matters none! Cheers! I’m glad you finished it.

Fo’sho: Yep, I been working on it for months, but I remained disciplined and I finished it before the due date.

Maybean: That’s remarkable!

Fo’sho: Have you ever thought about abiding by a specific guideline to help you bring out your ideas to light? It could help with your productivity. It helped with mine!

Maybean: Nah, I haven’t thought much about that.

Fo’sho: Well wouldn’t you want to try it now that you see it may work for your benefit?

Maybean: I May do that. I mean, you don’t see me suggesting to you my method of flushing out ideas not because you can’t do it but because it never occurred to me that you might find it interesting.

Fo’sho: My method seems more productive, but then again, I haven’t tried yours.

Maybean: And neither have I tried yours.

Fo’sho: I guess we both got work to do. Or we can continue blind? I suppose it doesn’t make much of a difference, if we arrive to the same lines of action.

Maybean: Our lines may be similar – they don’t got to be the same – you do your thing and I’ll do mine!

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Cuz, I Sway So

Cuz, I Sway So

On this journey, often you are in the passenger’s seat! You ain’t the one driving – you don’t always get to change the song.

Why?

Because, I sway so!

The way I do it is according to my flow. The method and rhyme in which I begin, starts with the middle first and then the end. For reasons unknown to you, I already found a center in the vin diagram.

The levels and turns that are to come will amaze! It may even bust you in the eye – if you ain’t careful!

Don’t worry! I don’t mean literally. I’m just getting started cuz my hands are warmer. I’m out the cold element. Now we both can arise from the darkness. Allow the light to enter by twisting the handle of the blinds. That’s right you ain’t blind!

*The Voice Inside listening to the other voice talking, sways inside*

You’ve already established that before this. I’ve been receiving the fullness of your flow since time past. I’ve had it to the extremes merely listening to your cause. Keep talking and continue to drown me in your reason. I doubt you’d stay in to watch.

Amplifying your retort. Begging me to listen because you have something to say(or sway)…Certainly, you want to share the root of your argument. I see it. I am aware. You have been on my case like white on rice. It’s inseparable. Should I give you rage? Or simply turn the page?

Scratch that. Maybe you just want me to see where you’re coming from? Shouting is a very narrow way to make a difference. I’ve let you finish by refusing to engage with you while you were making your points. You already made several. I stood there in silence to just wait for it to pass over.

I’d appreciate the same passing of words while I’m talking. What’s true is that all of that ain’t gotta be here or there. That ain’t even this rather that is on that.

So Riddle Me This… (Not Yet)

Cuz I Sway So!

Swollen Moon

Swollen Moon

I smell like the fragrance of the golden moon

Strawberry scents of the rich skies which make them swoon

Without saying words, shared stories of my tailored made dress

Can’t tell if they’re clever enough to unbutton it with finesse

At the mercy of the bird – I hear their word

Their wings soaring a tune, while the daylight hides from the moon

There they stood – looking at me from the lowest to the highest top

If they focused any longer,

They would be able to see that I just don’t want it to stop

I felt eaten alive as they studied my charts

From all of the truth to the lies

From the deepest pits of hell and my nightmares

To the overflowing heavenly skies

I’m the pariah and I’m the prey

I toss with the wind and I can never stay

I’m the pariah and I’m the prey

I toss with the wind and can never stay

My growth expands me into multi-dimensional halls

All of the signs are written on the Cosmic Walls

My growth expands me into multi-dimensional halls

All of the signs are written on the cosmic walls

Written on the cosmic walls

All of the signs are written on the Cosmic Walls

I smell like the fragrance of the golden moon

Strawberry scents of the rich skies which make them swoon

They describe to me, the direction of your heavenly flight –

I shall truly reach the depths of this melodic height…

At the mercy of the bird – I hear their word

Their wings soaring a tune,

While the daylight hides from the moon

I felt eaten alive as they studied my charts

From all of the truth to the lies

From the deepest pits of hell and my nightmares

To the overflowing heavenly skies

My growth expands me into multi-dimensional halls

For all of the signs are written on the Cosmic Walls

My growth expands me into multi-dimensional halls

All of the signs are written on the Cosmic Walls

This song appears of Jeremy Garner’s album ‘Sensory Illumination‘ .

REQUESTS // CAFÉ

REQUESTS // CAFÉ

The following script is in connection to a series of conversations entitled ‘Riddle Me That…’ which is due to release at the beginning of 2019.

Double D: Hey, Mike can you buy me some food because I’m hungry and I ain’t got the money.

Mike: Sorry Double D, I ain’t got it like that – I just got enough for myself.

Double D: See Mike! That’s what I’m talking about – you can’t even help anybody out without thinking for yourself! How can you be so selfish!

Nathaniel: Whoa – calm down bro, I’ll buy you something.

Double D:  Do You even know how hard it is for families to eat?! I was gonna take this food and bring it back to my family because they haven’t seen a meal in a while! We are all hungry and I can’t even request some food without someone telling me they don’t have it?! You don’t have it? What do I have?

Mike: Sorry, Double D – I just didn’t have enough for the both of us this time around.

Nathaniel: It’s ok my bros – Double D, what do you want? Pick anything you need right now and I’ll head with you to the store – and buy whatever your family needs for the week. Now follow me, bro.

Double D: Thanks Nathaniel, I appreciate you – not many understand how hard it is for people.

Nathaniel: Yo, I get that but it’s hard for people out here too. You ain’t have to call mike selfish, he didn’t have enough, and you made a scene out there – embarrassing him and that wasn’t right.

Double D: Nah but I know he had it! He clearly was bugging because he didn’t think of others.

Nathaniel: Do you hear how that sounds? He was being selfish because he told you – he didn’t have it? Reverse the script. How would you respond, if you were Mike’s Situation? You ain’t the only one going through hard times bro! Requesting for something doesn’t mean you are entitled to those requests! I can take you out on the streets to people who got it harder than you and Martha. You got kids – they grow up fast. Ruth must be 10 and Tim must be an adolescent- shit gets expensive, but we all struggling out here in some way.

Double D: Oh Lord! Sounds like your preaching man! If I had the money, I’d pass you an offering. I doubt you struggling that much if you’re willing to help me out for the week bro.

Nathaniel: Well I have enough. It’s not a sacrifice for me – but this doesn’t mean it HAS to be a sacrifice for others. Mike had only enough for himself. I have more than enough for myself and others. I’m just glad I was right behind y’all – so I could pinch in and volunteer service. I ain’t trying to preach to you but shit, no one never knows the extent of another person’s dilemma. We owe ourselves empathy-even if you’re desperate for change. What’s going to happen here one day is that you won’t always be struggling. You’re going to work it out. Martha is going to get that promotion and the both of Y’all will have enough to take care of your kids and others. You ain’t going to stay in this bad spot – it might be hard and long but shift happens.

Double D: It’s gonna take a miracle at this point. Some people never make it out of their dilemma. Remember Henry? The Postman? Well, ever since his moms died – he been struggling bad. He had to sell his house and now he’s living in a shelter. His wife left him for another life and he works a lot – two jobs and still sometimes can’t make ends meet. Good thing he doesn’t have any children, cuz shit he wouldn’t be able to contribute much of nothing to their basic needs. Some people don’t make it out even if they pull their bootstraps up and hustle till their purple in the face. I don’t want to get to that point but I also ain’t naïve to forget the sun don’t always shine in the alleys. (Especially on the 5th avenue if you know what I mean?) Haha.

Nathaniel: Yeah, we’ll winging this game of life thing! I just think we can all do better. And all of this makes me beg the question of existence. If you had my life you’d be happy for a while because you wouldn’t be stressed about necessities. Yet, you’d worry about the other things that come with my kind of life. I suppose you’re never free from troubles no matter how good you got it. What’s the point of living if we’re all going to die anyway? I read a story about a millionaire who ended his life anyway. Money doesn’t bring happiness. I suppose it can for a brief period, but happiness seems to be engineered by biology. Some people are born happier than others and that’s to no fault of your own.

Double D: Sheeeiitt. Money is energy and good money is always appreciated bro! I appreciate you Nathaniel. I guess I didn’t have to act out so aggressively to Mike. It was just the rage of me tired of being ignored. It’s all a game of time now, goes to show anything can happen when one is HANGRY! 😀 Thanks for looking out!

Nathaniel: Next time you request of a reply make sure your ROAR is not so intimating! Ha, it’s all good bro, we’re a blessing to be a blessing!

Cursed Belonging

Cursed Belonging

Cursed be the memory that led me to you – it was an illusion

A trick of the mind which entered me like a toxic pollution

The pollinated air and well-trained disguise guided me by making me adaptive

Those allergies produced a cough and itch that’s prisoned me captive

How could I ever resist that infallible rose

A token of blossom laced with the protection of the thorns which are clothes

I’m cut by the tender clinch

Reminded yet again that everything we hold requires us not to flinch

A forged experience completely entwined by a complex tribe

If we only listened to the call of the shadows – Would this still be a bribe?

Now, I’m like a ghost wishing to belong to a world opposite of the dream

Steady longing for those sketches of empty frames which scream

Envisioning to be filled yet again with color and personality

The curse of belonging is a memory from the heart of commonality but not factuality

Levitating of LOVE

Levitating of LOVE

She started polishing my shoe but then told me that we weren’t going anywhere…YET

By the time she was finished – I had a pulsating shine.

I was ready to walk down the halls with my boot, you see?

I was ready to read.

The book was very exciting and I could tell line by line – how enthralled I was beginning to feel.

I started with the preface. It was a proper introduction as it briefed me on what I was about to witness.

I became even more earnest when realizing how inviting the chapters were.

I then began to turn the pages.

The crisp sound made me even more anxious to reach the climax.

SuggestiveReads-3.jpg

Keep Reading…

I’m sure I won’t be putting this book down anytime soon.

We both started to levitate and by the end of the book – the closing chapter read as follows:

In love, we can levitate
Not just by the ascension of the sky
But also falling down with hope
That we may land on the grass but if not
Our splattering bodies can transform what is yet to be known
Our tissues, blood, nerves, and bones are evidence of
What we can’t see is that which keeps us alive
ACTUALLY
Maybe it’s better – if we lay together without falling
For a rest, we will remember when our dreams invite us to sleep
Just thinking of the destinations we can explore and how much fun we’ll have
Yet – Those places don’t compare to the journey found with you
Holding your hand is magic plush
I can think of nothing better than to be with you
Half of what I am must be spent with you
The other half of me is mining how I should repay you for blessing me
I’m never breathing this moment because I have so much more to give
It’s true – a token like this is rare and newly found
I’m giving it to you and in return, we can be as wealthy as ascending atoms

DEDICATED: To all of the book(s), I’ve had the pleasure to read. Thank you for allowing me to levitate in love. ❤ 

 

Level UP @ 3

Level UP @ 3

Tempting to make a living out of a death sentence. That’s the struggle for existence. Caught in between the cycle of wanting and owning. LEVEL UP!

The abrasive wrestle between gone and coming. There is both the need to be seen in invisible clothes. LEVEL UP!

When talking to you – I’ll repeat what you said in order to indicate I was listening. If you don’t want those words thrown back at you I’ll just ’MmmHmm’ You until you get the point. LEVEL UP!

Seeing as I experienced one of the most random trips recently to Arizona and neighboring areas – it’s about time I level up! *seriously, shit has been absolutely crazy // having a car accident on my way to the airport.*

I’ve taken for granted living in Sweden for a long time. Coming back to America for a spell meant more sugar, money, and unforeseen realities all encouraging me to level up.

Settling for what has already been prepared is a danger zone. You have to see ahead like the eagle and use all of the resources made available to you. Wherever you are – it’s imperative that you level up!

010718 Dutchman Superstition Mountains-28.jpg
What do I mean by ‘Level Up’? Simply, regain your fuel. You’re spending at this very moment precious time and energy. You can covert this at your leisure but you most certainly use the wings you’ve been provided to fly away into productive manifestation.

Don’t wait for nothing. Nothing ain’t coming but something is always around the corner.

Believe that!

This fact has made me more aware of my wrestle with paranoia and the weight that comes with it. Basically, Murphy’s Law is a B*I*T*C*H*! Knowing that anything that can go wrong will go wrong – has been coughing me up and especially seeing my connection with the number 3.

For as long as I could recall numbers would follow me in some way. Whether it’s some form of ‘7’ (14,56,34) or some form of ‘9’ – it has happened to me all the time. This particular season of *2018* we are only 21 Days Into it – 3×7 – 3 has been this important number of leveling up. I’ve seen it in the most inconvenient and teaching way possible.

Which goes back to my relationship with paranoia – which isn’t always a great way for it to reveal itself back to me. Let’s say two bad things have happened to me back to back – then I start thinking another bad thing must be on its way towards me.

Although, this could also mean something really good is due to happen to balance it all out.

I want to level up but it’s hard when your mind starts making nonsense out of coincidental situations. (Or is it coincidental?)

I doubt myself and while I believe this is a very good quality it can become problematic due to not having enough faith in myself.

We should all level up, yes? Can we do this without annihilating our present convictions? Certainly!

I don’t have a particular formula to establish this – but I do know that all of us are apart of this game of connecting all of our experiences. The way in which we do is selective to our interpretative measures. If we ease on the stress and live in the moment, we’ll do better at remembering “The Birds are Singing” we don’t have to hang on to fear and stress, stress, stress, and more stress.

Thanks, Sananda.

Obsession With Filling (Feeling) The Page

Obsession With Filling (Feeling) The Page

I gotta feel what I’m writing. In search of this ‘feeling’, I’ve had to wrestle with just how much I’m writing on a page. If I write too little will people think I had little to say? If I write too much – got damn, I’m on my Jester Rants! (Btw, my YouTube channel will resurrect with more content this year!)

I want to win but I know losing is literally trying to find out what people like/want. Trying to fit in what people expect is much like the weather. It changes from day to day, although it’s much easier to know your target market through proper analytics! I must heed this while breaking into new areas.

The motivation, inspiration, and persuasion have always been a wavy sense of connection. I’m an explorer and the more I Search – I see an undeniable encoding in various life experiences.

The more I dig, the greater this connection speaks to me. As I’m writing this – I’m already seeing several ways this blog is gonna go. How do I maintain my focus without losing the ‘feeling’?

You feel me?

It’s important to chase the feeling and follow it wherever it leads you. As of now – my thoughts are leading me to fill the space. We don’t have to keep writing but the more I do – the closer I am to getting to my point.

The lines are drawn and the door is open. The more I write what I feel, the clearer I see how everything is connected. After all, buttons Connect and that’s why we button up our shirts. The symbols I see in everyday interaction come to life through my words. My words will become a platform for discovering the hidden and visible.

I find that at times, I’m caught in between the insufferable *but pleasurable* thigh of allegory and innuendo. I enjoy the warm embrace of making sense out of philosophical possibilities. This can be a task too daunting for my readers. It makes you read a lens not so commonly visited. You stand to benefit with this-this is a remix. Something that’s already been said but my way.

2018 is here and already 14 Days Into it, I’ve had to put in the work before it arrived. I use to say “I always am writing” but this couldn’t be further from the truth. I can’t always write otherwise – I wouldn’t have time to process, read, or observe. What is true though – is I can encourage myself to write with knowledge of a paycheck or simple creative fun. Getting into the habit of writing helps me contextualize those random words that always seem to float somewhere.

This year – I am taking more seriously the notion that I’m writing a book. I’m gonna need your help. It won’t write itself but the basis of it is already laid out.

I’m excited to share with you what more my pen will reveal. After all – It’s all about writing until the pens run out! Only this time – I ain’t doing it just to fill the page as long as I’m feeling it, the hope is that you will too!

Bless up!

Concentrated Stare

Concentrated Stare

What are you staring at?

Could it be my dark skin paired with beige company beside me?

What about my countenance – is it that threatening to be remembered later?

What gives you the thrill to focus so long on what’s in front of you?

Pardon all of my questions – but you don’t seem to mind answering all of where your curiosity leads.

I don’t mind if you take a look but to follow with your wandering eyes seems a bit much.

You are concentrating so much with your stare – I can literally hear what you think!

All of the assumptions and judgments, they aren’t all pleasant.

I feel it and I can see where you’re going with this.

Therefore, I’m gonna give you something absurd.

A middle finger or a twisted face.

I’m not sure yet – but the more you look – you’ll notice.

Enough to get you talking to your family at the dinner table.

I can already hear you telling them about how you saw someone so peculiar.

It’s funny how in an instant someone can become the talk of the day.

I’ve become famous already through your concentrated stare.

How highly you must think of me. To offer me such consideration in your eyes.

So you like what you see?

Even if you don’t – subconsciously your curiosity is a bit deeper than you expect.

I feel the power of your eyes – it’s pulling me like the moon.

How full your eyes are – staring into all the deepest crevices of my movement.

Your eyes are doing all the talking and I’m convinced your mouth is too shy to speak.

Don’t be shy – there’s language that rhymes with staring.

It starts with a hello and ends at: What are you looking at?

SYZYGY 21.

SYZYGY 21.

A solar eclipse is a lineup of the Sun, the Moon, and Earth. (Also known as a syzygy.)

The Moon, directly between the Sun and Earth, casts a shadow on our planet.

It’s something that rarely happens, but every once a while we have the fortune of experiencing it.

The Moon has to be between the Sun and Earth for a solar eclipse to occur. The only lunar phase when that happens is the New Moon, which happens to be tonight!

Where I am (Örebro, Sweden) We are unable to see the Solar Eclipse.

However, in light of this phenomenon – I wrote a poem which is featured below.

Syzygy 21

Syzygy, oh Syzygy – what a name to pronounce.

This is perhaps the reason you visit at infrequent hours.

Like the rising sun which comes to return a promise of a new day.

These are the glories that awaken us to dream without borders.

There’s a story in the stars waiting to be heard by our steady focus.

Looking widely with enlarged renewal entrances – our perspective refreshes again.

A shower to experience – a sight to behold.

Can you taste the connections as they subtract and multiply?

The moon up above desires to know us through our changing phases.

Those patterns that we can’t predict – the moon shares the same fate.

It is now the time of the alarm again only this time, some may not hear it.

Their lunacy has become full of unforeseen reasons.

But they may take hope! For the eclipse shall come again – in the future years where they’ll be ready for it.

This time now – We’ll glance through the computer screen to awe at the impending joy of these fragile moments.

For with my senses I can feel the power and my eyes can taste the light.

The new moon is invisible from our eyes, yet this is a time where all is full and aligned.

The black moon now creates a pressing desire to be found in the key of turning graces.

Serene glistens are carried in those who can catch with their eyes – a sight to behold for a lifetime.

But if by chance you again, miss a site like this due to the arrangement of time and circumstance.

Staring at the blanket in the sky will remind you of a light that’s been here long before you got here.

The Syzygy 21 transforms passions of desire with elation into poetic song.